TOXIC RELATIONSHIP
If you are in relationship, have you feel something wrong with your relationship or with the guy/girl you are with?
Or
You feel empty even you are in relationship? Cry all night most of the days and rarely laugh when you are with him/her? Thinking or dilusion what will you feel if you are with other person and the new guy/girl can treat you better? Overthinking and insecure like hell and blame yourself or your partner and feeling exhausted because you tried so hard to fix this relationship but nothing change?
I attend to Yasmin Mogahed talk recently, and this one lady, If you look at her once, you might think she is pretty with smile on her face, she looks happy to me. During the Q&A session, she told the audience that her previous marriage is abusive and she met a new guy hoping to find happiness but unfortunately, the second guy was more abusive mental and physical. It is really toxic and she is the victim. She blamed herself.
I attend to Yasmin Mogahed talk recently, and this one lady, If you look at her once, you might think she is pretty with smile on her face, she looks happy to me. During the Q&A session, she told the audience that her previous marriage is abusive and she met a new guy hoping to find happiness but unfortunately, the second guy was more abusive mental and physical. It is really toxic and she is the victim. She blamed herself.
Is it the definition of toxic relationship? Well i guess so if its full with negativity. Full with pain.
When it comes to relationship, no one should be discriminate and only look at one gender or side only. Guys totally did mistake/s but that does not mean girls did not do terrible mistakes too.
When it comes to this topic, aku tak claim im an expert but this is just my 2 cents. Being in real relationship wasn't easy at all. If you are happy then good but most of us struggling to be happy.
Oh yeah, even healthy relationship can get toxic too.
Nowadays too many cases or stories about cheating, "men are trash", " girl are trash" and many more.
I might said those "trash" word to people that knows me but personally I think both sides are trash. I realize that you, your own self can prove that you are not a "trash" type. As a man, this is a hint for you, watch 'To all the boys that I've loved before' and learn from Peter Kavinsky (since it is so famous now). A simple note or letter for your woman is all you need (at least). I know you might think " sape je bagi surat sekarang?" It doesn't need to be everyday, once a month or twice a year? or on your important date with her should be fine. Nostalgic.
I think most of the girls really wait for man to make a first move first and I know some guys runs out of ideas. You might afraid she doesn't like what you will do or it might be too bored but hey, try just give a shot. She will appreciate it and after that ask her what she likes or she prefers to improve your first move. Eventually you will become professional. And, expensive gifts or suprises means nothing if you tak ikhlas and buat semata-mata atas hukum buat je. Be sincere.
Listen to her. I know what she said might be nonsense or only occurs in fairy tale or ridiculous story about "hey, i found cokcroach in my room and my cat eat it." Listen and give your opinion sincerely. If you want to advice her, approach in a nice way. Do it with mannerism and be gentleman. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS NEVER TAKE HER FOR GRANTED! I tell you, you will regret it later.
Oh if your relationship gets rough, and boys, if you meet someone new, and have feelings for her PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let your partner knows first. Don't do things behind her back. Don't cheat. You are playing with someone's precious daughter and sister! Be brave to tell her in polite way. Tell her why you should end the relationship and say thank you to her. Be a man that have courage to tell the truth. Don't let her know about your new affair from others. Korang mungkin tak fikir Panjang but hey, what if kifarah or karma happens back at you. Mungkin bukan kau yang kena dipermainkan. It could be your sister, your daughter. Be Honest!
Okay as for the girls,
oh yeah,
Im that type of girl who wont WhatsApp my guy first. If he doesn't WhatsApp me, I will not WhatsApp him. One day? 1 week? I wait. Wont make my first move. Why? I don't have any idea why I become like this but I just feel appreciated if he starts the conversation first. Plus, Im afraid he might be busy and have stuff to do.
But I would like to remind myself and girls out there that atleast try to make your first move. Guys sometimes like that. Dia tak rasa macam bertepuk sebelah tangan. Make his favourite food or listen to his stories too. Its not only him to be a good listener but you too. If he doesn't like what you do, talk don't sulk. If you mad he talks to other girls, he also have the right to mad at you if you talk to other man. Don't say it is okay for you but not for him. It is unfair.
Dont make your partner as your slave. If you are not married yet and having a date, PLEASE split the bills. He does not have the responsibilities to pay all the bills every single day you go out with him. Unless he is willingly to pay all that and both of you have no difficulties with that. Treat him well and listen to his stories too. Give responds and treat him as how you wanted to be treated by him.
If at the end, your relationship is still in toxic condition and cannot be mend and heal. It is the best to break it. Don't let any toxic people come into your life anymore it will effect your emotion and physical. Leave them and put trust in God that you will meet someone better and perfect for you.
Put your heart first. Don't make it hurt more. Enough is enough. End it.
I pray that all of you will find your true love and will be happy. Amin.
creds: all pictures are from google.
-amnisabri-
Oh yeah, even healthy relationship can get toxic too.
Nowadays too many cases or stories about cheating, "men are trash", " girl are trash" and many more.
I might said those "trash" word to people that knows me but personally I think both sides are trash. I realize that you, your own self can prove that you are not a "trash" type. As a man, this is a hint for you, watch 'To all the boys that I've loved before' and learn from Peter Kavinsky (since it is so famous now). A simple note or letter for your woman is all you need (at least). I know you might think " sape je bagi surat sekarang?" It doesn't need to be everyday, once a month or twice a year? or on your important date with her should be fine. Nostalgic.
I think most of the girls really wait for man to make a first move first and I know some guys runs out of ideas. You might afraid she doesn't like what you will do or it might be too bored but hey, try just give a shot. She will appreciate it and after that ask her what she likes or she prefers to improve your first move. Eventually you will become professional. And, expensive gifts or suprises means nothing if you tak ikhlas and buat semata-mata atas hukum buat je. Be sincere.
Listen to her. I know what she said might be nonsense or only occurs in fairy tale or ridiculous story about "hey, i found cokcroach in my room and my cat eat it." Listen and give your opinion sincerely. If you want to advice her, approach in a nice way. Do it with mannerism and be gentleman. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS NEVER TAKE HER FOR GRANTED! I tell you, you will regret it later.
Oh if your relationship gets rough, and boys, if you meet someone new, and have feelings for her PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let your partner knows first. Don't do things behind her back. Don't cheat. You are playing with someone's precious daughter and sister! Be brave to tell her in polite way. Tell her why you should end the relationship and say thank you to her. Be a man that have courage to tell the truth. Don't let her know about your new affair from others. Korang mungkin tak fikir Panjang but hey, what if kifarah or karma happens back at you. Mungkin bukan kau yang kena dipermainkan. It could be your sister, your daughter. Be Honest!
Okay as for the girls,
oh yeah,
Im that type of girl who wont WhatsApp my guy first. If he doesn't WhatsApp me, I will not WhatsApp him. One day? 1 week? I wait. Wont make my first move. Why? I don't have any idea why I become like this but I just feel appreciated if he starts the conversation first. Plus, Im afraid he might be busy and have stuff to do.
But I would like to remind myself and girls out there that atleast try to make your first move. Guys sometimes like that. Dia tak rasa macam bertepuk sebelah tangan. Make his favourite food or listen to his stories too. Its not only him to be a good listener but you too. If he doesn't like what you do, talk don't sulk. If you mad he talks to other girls, he also have the right to mad at you if you talk to other man. Don't say it is okay for you but not for him. It is unfair.
Dont make your partner as your slave. If you are not married yet and having a date, PLEASE split the bills. He does not have the responsibilities to pay all the bills every single day you go out with him. Unless he is willingly to pay all that and both of you have no difficulties with that. Treat him well and listen to his stories too. Give responds and treat him as how you wanted to be treated by him.
 |
| he will be clingy like usui hahaha |
If at the end, your relationship is still in toxic condition and cannot be mend and heal. It is the best to break it. Don't let any toxic people come into your life anymore it will effect your emotion and physical. Leave them and put trust in God that you will meet someone better and perfect for you.
Put your heart first. Don't make it hurt more. Enough is enough. End it.
I pray that all of you will find your true love and will be happy. Amin.
creds: all pictures are from google.
-amnisabri-
Haha akak layan kaichou wa maid sama
ReplyDeleteTHAT is the only anime i tengok hahahahha
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